Posts tagged ‘Senate’

August 1, 2011

Haiku News, 1 August 2011

by WOO

Wild boars invade farms, attack pets

Peaceful happy farm
What is that I see coming?
Motherfucking boar!

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Woman faces trial for fake testicles

South Carolina
Hanging people acceptable
Truck nuts cross the line

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Senate panel schedules Google antitrust hearing

Anti-trust nonsense
If Google owns everything
Search more accurate

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Republican Boehner wants Monday vote on debt deal

Boehner on Monday?
Vagiehna wants it right NOW
See what I did there?

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Statue for Chuck Berry erected in St. Louis

Been near sixty years
Since Chuck Berry erected
Saint Louis – look out!

June 13, 2011

Woo’s News, June 13, 2011

by WOO

US Scores Three More Insider-Trading Convictions

There are criminals on Wall Street. Who fucking knew?

Vancouver’s Lapierre finds success to the max after leaving Ducks

Wait… this is about hockey? Can’t seem to give a shit…

Facebook IPO seen moving ahead in first quarter

So a nerd found out how to make money off of people posting status updates every time the weather changes by two degrees, they eat dinner, suffer gastrointestinal issues, or find a Youtube video mildly enjoyable. Just think, everytime you tell us about your second cousin’s graduation, or post a photo of a kitten talking jibberish, it’s worth cold hard cash, to someone else.

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