Posts tagged ‘America: Fuck Yeah!’

October 13, 2011

Woo Stands Erect In Solidarity With Occupy Wall Street

by CHRISTOPHER WOO

July 18, 2011

WNF 101

You've found it! We're Not Funny, a comedy blog written by a group of writers, comedians and friends. We have nearly 300 original comedy posts here. To begin reading and enjoying, click the logo on the top of this page.

So you’re new to reading the WNF website? Or you want to revisit a favorite old  post? Here are a few quick ones to consider:

WNF Beers

Eight new parody beer labels from the WNF Macrobrewery.

Catching Up With the Caught

“To Catch a Predator: Where Are They Now? Edition”

12 Words Come Out of Closet

SOHO, NEW YORK — A dozen English language words, ranging from the commonly used “Under” and “Pitcher” to the more obscure “Catcher” and “Obscure,” stood onstage together at a press conference Monday to announce that they are gay.

Klan Kalls It Kwits

With membership down, the KKK re-brands its image.

Cleanup in Aisle 6

Ever view your trip through the supermarket checkout lane as your five minutes to perform for a captive audience of one?

Paired Facebook Likes

When you click “like” on two different Facebook pages, Facebook runs an announcement on your friends’ newsfeeds, with those items listed as a pair. (EX. Andrew Hicks likes Obesity and Big Macs.”) These are some classic actual examples.

My 5 Most Abused Forms of Alcohol

WNF co-founder and editor in chief Andrew Hicks, who spent a decade as a monster lush, looks back on his time spent with beer, wine, vodka, whiskey and tequila, in that order.

Know Your WNFer

Get to know the founders and senior contributors of We’re Not Funny, some of whom are no longer with us. (By which we mean, they left the group. They’re not dead. That we know of.)

January 1, 2011

Men Of Infamy: Mr. Way-Too-Much-Lighter-Fluid Firestarter

by WOO

In this post, we give props and respect due to you, Mr. Way-Too-Much-Lighter-Fluid Firestarter. A prime argument against natural selection, that’s what you are. Armed with three cans of lighter fluid and an “America: Fuck Yeah!” lighter, you’re off to get this bonfire party started. Starter logs? Those are for pussies! Rolled-up newspaper? That’s Boy-Scout shit.

All you need, Captain Conflagration, is a bundle of those logs from the gas station, three empty beer-case boxes, that broken kitchen chair and the particle board and stickers that made up what used to be your entertainment center purchased from Wal-Mart.

You, Knight Of The Flame, marinate the wood in lighter fluid as if it were a New York Strip steak. Two bottles of lighter fluid should do; you’ll need the third for a random Hiroshima reenactment.

You lower your No Fear baseball cap to protect your freshly-grown-back eyebrows, and you strike the lighter. Away it goes, Professor Inferno, a massive fireball reaching 40 feet into the air, nearly setting alight the neighbor’s white oak. You smile brightly at your triumph, our Prince Of The Pyre. Added bonus: All the fuzzies were singed off of your Flannel Shirt.

Baron Of Brimstone, your duty is completed. We give you praise oh He Of Hellfire, for you are a man. A man’s man.