3DSC, Day 12: Song you just like because of the video

edited by ANDREW HICKS
creatively conceived by J.MIZ

WNF 30-DAY SONG CHALLENGE
DAY 12: SONG YOU JUST LIKE BECAUSE OF THE VIDEO

J.MIZ

When asked about being so close to a vicious, deadly creature, the snake said Britney was cool, but that song she did called "Lucky" was a piece of crap.

Oh Baby Baby” and “I’m a Slave 4 U” by Miss Britney. Who says chicks can’t have school girl and snake fantasies?! And she danced her white girl booty off. I loved “Slave” on MTV and in the club, but neither got put on a J.Miz mix tape of any sort.

ANDREW HICKS
I put “Slave” on a mix CD. And I don’t think I would have paid attention to any Britney Spears song if not for the videos. Except “Toxic.” “Toxic” is pure pop genius.

J.MIZ
She’s sexy when she’s not banging K-Fed or batshit.

ANDREW HICKS
At first, I thought you meant when Britney’s not banging K-Fed or banging batshit.

J.MIZ
I’m pretty over “Thriller,” but that’s by far one of the best videos ever made ever ever.

ANDREW HICKS
I’m pretty over YouTube videos of flash mobs imitating the “Thriller” graveyard dance sequence.

J.MIZ
I like the pseudo-lesbianism of Alicia Silverstone and Liv Tyler in the AerosmithCrazy” video, but the meter of that song gets my goat. (What am I, 80 now? Gets my goat? WTF.) Not to hate on Aerosmith and get simultaneously jooked by Buddah, but that’s my least favorite song of theirs. The bitches be banging though.

ANDREW HICKS
I was 16 and mega-hot for Alicia Silverstone when “Cryin’” and “Amazing” came out. When Liv got added to the mix for “Crazy,” it just got better and better. I found it a little unnerving in the video when they intercut shots of Liv writhing on the stripper pole with her daddy Stevie Tyler performing identical moves during his soundstage lip-synch session.

INSCRUTABLE JEFFREY TROTTER
Fuck Aerosmith. Every Aerosmith song and album of the last 15 years has sounded exactly the same. The most noteworthy thing about them now is Steven Tyler’s long and winding road to androgyny. The career path of Aerosmith is the greatest argument for the decriminalization of all drugs: They spend the ’70s all fucked up and put out epic rock music. They get clean, and a hundred consecutive songs end up sounding like “Livin’ on the Edge” (which sucks).

J.MIZ
Ween, Aerosmith… got it.

INSCRUTABLE JEFFREY TROTTER
All Ween is bad. Aerosmith prior to 1977 is pretty damned good. Joe Perry and Brad Whitford left the bad around 1979-80 and didn’t come back til the mid ’80s, when they were off the drugs and had gotten rid of that pesky external genitalia. And Aerosmith was never the same.

RYAN KRAUSE
Cradle of Filth, “From the Cradle to Enslave.” In what other video can you see an instrumental violin break being expressed in gothic video form? By “gothic video form,” I mean two women standing over a bathtub full of blood. Where is that blood coming from? Why, it’s coming from the wrists of the women who are playing the violin on the tendons of their wrists with a long, bow-like blade. Fucking brilliant!

JESSICA STIMSON
“We Made You,” by Eminem. Love Eminem impersonating Elvis, passing a burger to a fat Jessica Simpson, Kim Kardashian‘s expanding ass…

WOO
Anything by Shakira.

MICHELLE DEE [MRS. WOO]
*gives Woo the Stink Eye*

Do yourself a favor and watch this video.

SARACAKES
Definitely “My Friend Dario” by Vitalic. I can watch that video endlessly. Those chicks are SO hot. And wearing SO little clothing. And the way they wag their asses. And why do they hop? And what’s… with the football helmets? Then there’s the headbanging dudes with all the speakers. The only reason I know of the song is because of the video. The cool thing is it’s not a bad song either, but seriously, by the end of the video, I don’t even care who Dario is and if he has indeed crashed. BTW, I second the Shakira thing.

J.MIZ
Triple Shakira. Rawr! And Ricky Martin videos! I’d fuck his gay ass! HARD! Ever since Menudo! Meow meow, Ricky Martin! Meow indeed!