Dear Chevelle, Jan. 10, 2011

Dear Chevelle:

Hello. This is Clara Mae Jenkins, and I has a concern I would like your assistance with. You see, I think my husband has been sexualizin with the babysitter. The kids tell me they “wrestle” together, the sitter and my man. They do it in the bedroom after hubbie comes home from work but before I get home from my evenin’ shift at Denny’s. Please tell me what I should do, I can’t stand the thought of him with that skank.

Worried In Wichita

Dear Worried,

Once I thawt my 3rd baby’s daddy was cheatin on me while I was at work.  I called his momma, Paster Greg, and Raydene – the big mouthed tubby-slut across the street – over for sum pie and coffee while the kids were in school.  I busted right in on him and that cum-guzzling hussy.  Now, not only is he paying me an obscene amount of child support, his momma knows his baby ain’t got no daddy,  he had to confess before the priest, and the entire town knows he was with that 4-toothed, chain-smoking whore.  Maybe this will work for you, sister? Lord willin!


Dear Chevelle,

Yo sister, I need your advise. My mom is totally tripping balls on me. She found my weed growing operation in the basement crawlspace and threatened to burn it all with the trash. Totally not awesome! That Home Shopping Network addicted hypocrite is gonna ruin my life! My buds will never forgive me if my buds get burnt up. Help me, I need a new surfboard, nahahaha.

Endo-Maniac in Encino

Dear Endo,

Let her know wut your bottom line is, and I ain’t talkin about that line you get on your ass after sun bathin that goes from tan to vampire pale. Offer to giv her a cut as a Home Shoppin Network allowance.  Or if drawin attentions to her addictions will stir up trouble offer her a pursentage for allowin you to operate your business on her property.  If that don’t work you and your buds should take up huffing. That there air for blowin off your computer keyboard works real nice-like.



Y’all can write 2 me with this here in4mayshun:

Chevelle Danniels
117 Walton Way
Trayler # 13
Dumas, AR 71639

or Emale me at:

%d bloggers like this: